it's written

every once and awhile
life throws you a sharp one
just to see if you are on the ball.

i was not on the ball.
in fact, i was off gallivanting
leaving the ball completely unattended.
and it all seemed to be perfectly fine.

until i got that splendid phone call.
the one that i waited for for months.

it was mcmasters.
and they had a spot.
and if i could be there in 2 days,
it was mine.

someone just offered me my career
my dream career
the career that i battled for
the career that so many people said
"not possible", especially "not on the first shot"

well, it was possible. on the first shot.

there is something you should know right now: i declined.

i did not decline right away
i pondered
and cried
and did not sleep despite over-exhaustion
and called landlords
and googled
and googled more
and rejoiced
and shared
and cried.

alas, moving two provinces in two days was not for me.

oh, how i wish i could be that brave soul
who packed it all up and landed in hamilton, on
with nowhere to live.

for now, i live out one more year in the prairies,
my mantra in my pocket:

if it is meant to be, it will be.

and i wholeheartedly believe myself.
i hit it once, i will hit it again.
and this time,
all the stars will line up
and i will be gone.